Life these days

 I'm entering week 4 of empty nest.  I've gone through the stages of emotions.  Week one was the honeymoon phase.  Week two was the grief stage.  Week three was the acceptance stage.  I can say with confidence that I'm adjusting better than I thought and I've settled into this new role.  These past four weeks I've had some time to reflect and I've noticed a few things.  First, I would never say I was a helicoptor parent and I'm fairly certain Mike and the boys would agree with me, however, I'm also a typical mom and I think the weight of worry I carried was real and something I wasn't fully aware of until the boys moved out.  I still worry about them but I've noticed I sleep better and I'm not concerned on where they are at night which is quite freeing.  When your kids live with you, no matter their age you are aware of their comings and goings.  For example the other night Jay was in our neighborhood spending the evening with friends.  Since he had been drinking he quietly let himself into our house to spend the night instead of driving home.  He didn't need to ask, nor were we aware that this was his plan, which is fine.  Our home is his home and it was obviously a good decision to stay. I was aware Jay was hanging out with friends but I've noticed I'm better with "let go and let God," attitude when they don't live with me.  I figured that if he had drinking he would make the right decision to stay at our house.  I went to bed and didn't think about it.  Normally I'd be up several times checking life360, listening for the back door to shut, watching for headlights in the driveway.  Between having adult kids that live with you and menopause sleep disruption has been a challenging reality for me but I think I didn't realize the weight of anxiety I carried until the kids moved out.  Mike and I had no idea Jay was even in the house until the morning when we saw his car parked in the drive and the loud snoring coming from the bedroom above ours (ha).  It occurred to me I had slept peacefully through the night.    I know my girlfriends have been praying for me during this new chapter and boy have I felt those prayers.  I am looking forward to this new chapter.