Promises of the Psalms

It's fair to say from some of my recent blog posts that I'm struggling with some things right now.  Although technically I'm not an empty nester, I sure feel like one and it's a hard adjustment.  I'm also struggling with issues my mom is having.  I have my faults but I'm pretty good at self reflection.  Lately I've noticed I'm living in the past way too much.  My mind takes me to "back when."  Back when I had my boys running through the trails in my yard.  Back when my mom was an active woman who I loved sharing things with.  Back when the Ausili's were at our house every weekend and back when my boys needed me. These memories are precious but it's almost like I can't seem to make the shift in moving forward.  It may look like I'm moving forward to others but my mind and heart tell me something different.  I have to laugh at the irony of it because I was exhausted as a young mother.  I remember all the walks Laura Beavers and I took.  We were certain once we got to empty nest phase we'd be on easy street.  Of course now Laura and I counsel each other frequently on how were supposed to get through this next phase of life.  We were sure we'd have it all figured out.  The beauty of good long time friends is priceless.  

The other day I was floating in my stock tank.  My stock tank is truly my empty nest phase gift from my sweet husband (more on that later).  I was reading my Guideposts magazine that my mother gives to me every month.  Every so often there are articles that literally speak to me.  As I turned the pages I came across an article entitled "The House I Loved."  It was written by Shawnelle Eliasen.  She has 5 boys and only two still live with her.  Tears were literally streaming down my face as I read her words.  She had written everything I felt.  She wrote, "The boys were often at after school activities, all opportunities we wanted for them.  But that meant I was usually puttering around the house alone, without even memories to keep me company."  Feeling unsettled at this particular stage in her life she wrote that she found comfort  through the promises of the Psalms.  I will be your dwelling place.  I'll go before you.  You don't have to be afraid.  As I finished reading Shawnelle's beautiful article I was certain God had orchestrated it, knowing exactly what I needed to read for encouragement.  

In the weeks and months ahead I'm going to work really hard on changing my mind set and not living in the past.  I will rely on the promises of the Psalms.  I intend live each day as if it's my last which I realize is sometimes easier said than done.  I am confident I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  

Psalm 84:1

How lovely is your dwelling place

Isiah 45

I will go before you

Psalm 118:6

The Lord is on my side I will not be afraid